Curious about Self-Directed Learning? Sue Patterson can help!

Sue is a veteran Home Educator with 3 grown kids.  All of her children were Unschooled, and Sue is a wealth of information on many aspects of alternative education.

From transitioning away from the curriculum mindset and into a learning partnership with your kids, to Unschooling through the teen years and supporting young adults as they transition into college or work, Sue’s perspective is invaluable.

If you are struggling with an aspect of Home Eduction or Partnership Parenting, Sue’s wisdom and experience can help reassure and guide you through the moments of doubt.

If you are simply curious about what Unschooling family life is like, she can share a comprehensive look based on her own experience and what she’s learned from her extensive network of Home Ed families.

Here are some of the sessions Sue will be leading at the Retreat.  We will hit the ground running on Friday morning with workshop sessions and circle discussions, so getting there Thursday to set up your bunks, tents and campers will ensure you don’t miss any of the action!

Learning All the Time: Unschooling 101
Friday Morning (Oct. 24)

Life Learning, Whole Life Learning, Self-Directed Learning, Organic Learning, Natural Learning, Interest-Led Learning.  There are so many different names for this type of alternative education and almost as many definitions.

Come discover the core principles behind this method of education.
Gain clarity on what Unschooling IS and is NOT.
Is there a “right” or “wrong” way to Unschool?  Is it still Unschooling if we require a few math or phonics worksheets here and there?    What is “Strewing?”  What is “Deschooling?”  What is “Radical Unschooling?” What are the benefits and drawbacks to Unschooling?  How can we be sure our kids will turn out OK educationally and otherwise?  What if I give my children freedom and all they do is play video games all day?  What if my child HAS to or WANTS to return to school in the future?  How do I comply with Homeschooling laws as an Unschooler? Can I do it as a single parent, or when both parents must be earners?
We’ll tackle these questions and help newbies, spouses, grandparents and in-laws understand this complex and rich form of education and help you discover tools to move forward with Unschooling in confidence.
To read more from Sue on this topic click here.

When Your Unschooler Chooses School

After being radically unschooled her whole life, Sue’s youngest daughter decided she wanted to go to the local public high school. While Sue supported her daughter’s choice, they “did high school” on their own terms. After a year and half, Sue’s daughter had enough and returned to the freedom of unschooling.

We will explore the ways that Unschoolers use mainstream schools, alternative schools and “schooly” classes and lessons to achieve their goals.  Can this still be considered “Unschooling?”  How can we support our children when they choose methods of education and institutions that we as parents are ideologically opposed to – or just feel are not the best “place” for our kids?  How can we allow our children to be exposed to the negative aspects of school that we have tried to shield them from all their lives?  Can a school truly be a place of Unschooling freedom?

Unschooling Teens

Are you worried about unschooling your teen? Are you afraid that your choices may close doors instead of opening them? Sue’s three grown unschoolers took completely different paths through the teenage years. Come hear how they navigated these years and rest assured that it does NOT have to be as scary as society makes it sound! Sue also wrote a book, Homeschooled Teens that will be available in October. She interviewed 75 teens and young adults who homeschooled/unschooled as teenagers. She will share their responses to her questions about what life was like for them: finding friends, learning opportunities, hobbies, sports, work, travel, advantages they feel they have now, advice for worried parents, and more!!

What does “Radiant Living” even mean???

By 2007 life events had led me to a point where I could no longer ignore the fact that I was put on this earth to
1. learn how to confidently hear and follow my “Inner Voice of Wisdom” and
2. help others do the same.

Often I just call it “The Voice” but it goes by many names: Intuition, Instinct, Gut Feelings, Higher Self, Inner Knowing, Emotional Guidance and more.  No matter what we call it or what we believe it to be, we’ve all “heard” it at one time or another – or THOUGHT we heard it and wondered.

Sometimes we listen and sometimes we don’t.

At pivotal moments in my life, this Voice has “come through” very loud and clear as it echoed in my head.  Other times it has taken a more subtle form: gentle nudges, strong feelings, hunches, feeling “guided” to take a certain action and other hard to describe phenomena .  But however my Inner Wisdom ultimately communicates with me, it always rings true in my heart and I have learned after 41 years of “experimentation” that it’s in my best interest to listen.

We are born tuned into The Voice, but the voices of our family, teachers and other “authorities” often steer us away from listening.  Sometimes this is done subtly and sometimes with strong coercion, threats or punishment.  By the time we are grown, most of us have learned to successfully ignore or drown out our Inner Voice of Wisdom with the external voices that hold power in our lives, our communities and in our culture in general.

What does all this have to do with Alternative Education or Partnership Parenting?

For me, choosing to approach education and parenting in this way is:

  1. a result of hearing (and finally following) my Inner Voice of Wisdom
    and
  2. a means by which I can continually practice listening – and recalibrating my actions and choices to line up with my Inner Wisdom

Almost every external voice I’ve ever heard has said things like:

  • “Children are too young and inexperienced to know what they want.  They CAN’T know what’s good for them.”
  • “Learning is difficult and can only happen when children are FORCED to sit and attend to ‘unpreferred’ activities.”
  • “There are certain things EVERY child MUST know and they must learn it in the time frame and order in which ‘educational professionals’ prescribe.”
  • “We must DEMAND respect from children (without reciprocating that respect).  We should not be our children’s ‘friends’ and if we don’t discipline, punish and force our children to do certain things, they will never learn respect, responsibility or be motivated to do anything productive with their time.”

My Inner Voice of Wisdom has NEVER agreed with these ideas on education and parenting that seem to be dominant in western culture at large.  The moment I made the decision to Unschool and try parenting without using punishment, the most profound sense of Peace came over me.  I’ve learned over the years that this sense of Peace is a strong indication that my actions are coming into alignment with my Inner Wisdom that has never steered me wrong.

Of course doubts and questions have arisen as our family has made our way toward Unschooling and Partnership Parenting, but these have just been opportunities for me to practice quieting those external voices and tune into myself and my children to find the answer that is right for our family.  And when things are still unclear I seek out experienced people on this path whose voices resonate with my my own Inner Wisdom.

Trusting children is a primary component to Unschooling and Partnership Parenting.  In my experience, learning to hear, trust and follow my OWN Inner Wisdom is ESSENTIAL to learning to trust my children.  How can we ever trust THEIR Inner Wisdom if we are unwilling or unable to trust our own?

So for me, Unschooling and working toward parenting in a non-coercive way can only be accomplished if I am CONTINUALLY tuning into my Inner Voice and recalibrating my actions to line up with that Voice.

Why RADIANT Living & Learning?

I’ve found that people who live from the inside out – meaning their motivations, choices and actions come from an authority within – these people GLOW.  Their lights shine more brightly in the world.  They RADIATE beauty and confidence and love and acceptance.  We are drawn to these people because we want to be like them – maybe not precisely imitating the details of their lives – but we want to live our lives with the confidence and authenticity they do.  There is a light in each of us that is trying to shine just as brightly.

We cannot live & learn “radiantly” when we are following someone else’s agenda.  That just dims our LIGHTS or blocks them out entirely.  When we are following our Inner Wisdom, pursuing our passions and fulfilling our life purpose, we SHINE.

At Radiant Living & Learning Events you will hear from Radiant Community Members who are creating the lives they desire by following their own inner voice.

If something you read on this website resonates with YOUR Inner Voice of Wisdom or makes you pause to reconsider the way you’ve always done things, the Radiant Living Community is sure to provide more inspiration and encouragement to confidently create the life you desire for yourself and your family.

We hope you will join us ONLINE or IN PERSON soon!

Heaps of Love,

 

 

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Self-Directed Learning: Do you have what it takes?

Yesterday I read a blog post called “24 Core Questions for Self Directed Learners.”
It was written by Lisa Nalbone.  Here’s a sampling:

What?

What do I want to learn?
What are my goals?
What are my next steps?
What problem can I solve?
What can I contribute?

You can read all of the 24 questions here:
24 Core Questions for Self-Directed Learners

For some reason the list didn’t sit right with me.  I couldn’t put my finger on exactly why, but initially the questions seemed kind of unnecessary to the way I personally approach learning and I couldn’t figure out how I would use it in facilitating my kids’ self-directed learning.

I wondered: Am I missing something?  Could this list offer us an opportunity to delve deeper somehow?   I asked in the comments of the post for suggestions on the application of this list since the way we approach learning at our house presumes that the “right” questions just come up naturally in the course of exploring one’s interests.
I asked, “If your learning is truly self-directed, why would you need to use somebody else’s list of questions?”

Lisa replied (I’m paraphrasing) that she intended the list as a starting point for those who are moving from school and a more “directed” learning style to a self-directed approach.  She also mentioned that sometimes those who’ve homeschooled or unschooled their young children worry about their kids approaching high school age, so the list is intended to help them remember that self-directed learning can work at any age.

She then asked about my family, our history with Unschooling and for my thoughts on her list of questions.
(You can read her entire response to my question in the comments section of her post.)

I wanted to share my answer with you here for two reasons:

  1. I’ve been meaning to write an “about me” page for this site and maybe this will do for now.
  2. Lisa’s answer helped me pinpoint what felt “off” for me about suggesting a list of questions and helped me formulate what I might offer instead.

Don’t get me wrong – I absolutely think we should help people gain confidence in their ability to direct their own learning.  I know parents DO need reminders that the organic learning little kids experience CAN continue into the teenage years and beyond.  Some people will totally benefit from Lisa’s list BUT my advice for these two groups of people would be very different from Lisa’s list of questions so here it is.

My kids are 13, 6 & 3.

I learned about Unschooling 6 years ago in 2007 as I was researching Homeschooling because it was very clear that my oldest child’s learning style was NOT a match to what they were doing in school.

I can’t remember the exact website where I first saw the concept.  At that time I was desperately searching for answers – staying up until 3am every night reading all over the internet about other people’s experiences with home education.    I knew I had to take my kid out of school, but I also knew that doing school-at-home was NOT a good choice for us because we were basically already doing that each night with homework and THAT was a nightmare.

My thoughts on the 24 core questions: I guess they could be a good starting point for someone who WANTS some guidance or who is SO used to being directed that they feel lost when trying to jump to entirely self-directed learning.  However, I believe that remembering how to be a self-directed learner is best accomplished when the person is encouraged to find their own way.  If we continue to “direct” them even with “suggested questions” aren’t we perpetuating their need to be directed?  When we tell someone how to do something we can miss a chance to help them gain confidence in their abilities to do it themselves.

Now, I’m not saying to never offer help, but in my mind the first way to help someone who doesn’t trust themselves and their abilities is to say, “I TRUST YOU to come up with the questions that will take you in the right direction.”  If they are stuck or otherwise asking for guidance I might ask them a couple of questions from this list, but those questions would arise naturally because of the situation, not because I looked at a list.

I’m realizing that one thing that feels “off” to me about the list is that it presumes that “learning” looks like what you might find in school.  And it seems to presume a lot of “shoulds” about learning.  Maybe this is because the list is intended for people who are used school type instruction and for people who are worried about their teenagers and what kids SHOULD learn at that age in preparation for “real life.” 

Fair enough, but learning at my house doesn’t look like this at all.  And I believe that real learning actually looks nothing like what we usually see in school.  At our house we don’t sit down and say, “Today I want to begin learning about XYZ.”  We just see things that interest us and then a question arises naturally and we set off to answer it.

These 2 questions from the list seemed especially unnecessary to me, and I’m going to go so far as to say they perpetuate a myth in our culture about the nature of learning:

“How do I know I have learned enough?”
“When will I finish?”

I know I have learned enough because I have no more questions about the thing – for now.  But tomorrow or in 6 months a question might arise on the topic.  When that happens I will try find the answer.  That could lead to more questions or it could lead to an interest in another topic entirely.  For me and my kids it is just an organic process of living life and answering the questions that arise as we explore the world.

From my perspective we are NEVER finished learning, and in our house we do not divide our learning up into subjects or “chunks of learning” that begin and end.  My hope is that one day we can change the cultural myth that learning begins when we reach a certain age and start going to a certain building each day at 8 am.  That learning ends at 3 o’clock or that it ends when you graduate from high school or college or graduate school or even when you finish a “self-directed learning project.”  I hope more of us can move beyond the idea we are ever “done” with learning or growing or becoming more.  So many in our society are so busy chasing an end goal that we lose the joy that comes from the process of achieving our goals.  We forget the value of each step along the way because we only value the end result.

At first I thought maybe I was missing something about how this list of questions could apply to my family.  They are a lovely offering for someone who is looking for something like this, but aside from possibly perpetuating myths about learning, I also wonder if suggesting these questions could perpetuate the very dependence we are hoping to eradicate as we work to empower people in learning under their own direction.

My advice for those people would be – trust yourself – the right questions are inside you and those questions will guide you to the right materials and resources and people that can help you learn the things you want to know.

And for parents I would say: trust your kids and the questions they naturally come up with.  And trust yourself to guide your kids when they are stuck and asking for guidance.

As a society we have a habit of looking to “experts” for answers – even answers about what questions to ask and about how to learn.  What I want people to know is this: We all are born knowing how to learn, and letting our natural curiosity guide us and help us formulate questions is going to lead us in the right direction every time. 

We ALL have what it takes to be self-directed learners!

Many thanks to Lisa for writing her list of questions for anyone who wants to start there.  And for giving me some food for thought. 🙂

What do you think?  What advice would you give to someone switching to self-directed learning?  Or to parents who are nervous about older children continuing with a self-directed approach through the high school years?  Please share in the comments below!